FOX HILLS CENTRAL

 
FOX HILLS CENTRAL
 
 
 

Anyone stupid enough to be following my updates will notice that I've transferred the re-energised golf 'fix' from the range to the course over the last few months. I'm now a member of Fox Hills and, after fronting up with the annual subs, I can play whenever I want, which is very good. I try to squeeze in two or three games a week, weather permitting.
 

Unfortunately, the status of my game hasn't shown the improvement one would expect with increased turf time. Shots from tee to green are highly erratic, around the greens pretty good but 'fuck awful' on the putting surfaces.
 

There have been a couple of unexpected occurrences since joining. The course seems to be a mecca for fuckin' crows and these bastards take great delight in commandeering your pill even when it's power napping in the middle of the fairway. I hit an uncharacteristic corker off the first tee today and strode triumphantly down to where the ball landed only to notice a group of these fuckers fighting over a small white thing way up on the green. Of course, the object of their bird dance was the Titleist 2 which I was playing. Given the fact that the green lies 348 metres from the tee, even my delusional self could not explain this 'Atlas' distancing as being the result of my athletic pivot.
 

The other thing I've noticed are the people playing on the course. Fox Hills has always had the reputation of being a sort of working class club and this was one of the reasons I joined............. not because I felt the 'pull' of the proletariat but because it's cheaper than the nearby Cumberland Country Club. Yes, there are a lot of comrades there but what really surprised me was the number of Asian-background and Subcontinent-background compadres stepping it out over the tight 5600 metre layout. And many of these buggers play a heap better than me. Where is the 'respeck'?
 

A lot of this talk about immigration and multiculturalism misses the whole bloody point. Oz is already a multicultural place and has been for two centuries. If the jokers I've seen walking up and down the Fox Hills' fairways are any indication, it's a pretty comfortable place too. Now if only they'd allow me one mulligan per hole.

 
P.S. I did hear a whisper that a group of Leb Muslims teed up in the club's 4 ball best ball stableford comp on the weekend.....but it's only a rumour.


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